So, that's what my heart has done. How do you mend a broken heart? What is the best way, or best recommendations from all of you? I need some help and I am just really unsure of myself right now.

booze, lots of sex, moody music, for phaze 1
then
booze, lots of sex, Happy Music (yeah I know but it works) and Sunshine Phaze 2

and If you need it: Time (phaze 3)

(and ofcourse booze and sex but then thats for general happieness)

sorry your sad

karoke and wrestling

Buy a guitar and a good amp and crank it up. It doesn't matter if you can play it. Just make noise that sounds right to you.

Chocolate? Ice cream?

Booze...yes...yum...booze...

Dr. Oni says do your best to chill and take some well deserved "Libby Time." I'll bet you will find that you missed it. It'll suck, but you'll get through it!

For me, it was always this formula:

day one: lots of being sad
day two: lots of being with friends
day three: about 200 dollars worth of alcahol down your gullet
day four: kick something in the head
day five: do a wrestling show, with 2 of your 4 favorite opponents, do a thumbtack spot, bleed all over the fucking place, and watch khan get dumped on his head by mike hanson.

um...when you get done there, do a REALLLLLLLY hot leggy gothy chick named Rhianna, who forces you to scream misfits lyrics while you have an orgasm.

maybe thats just MY way of doing it.....but it sorta worked.

then i went to a shrink about 3 years later, and everything was solved.

I recognize that I am going to be physically abusing a deceased equine, but you've got to take small steps. For the first few days, it's okay to go on a bender. After that's over your probably going to have to distract yourself in order to not think about it. I recommend needlepoint or mud wrestling. Other than that the previous posts sum it up more eloquently than I could.

You'll be alright.

Oh, sweetie, I'm so sorry!

Junkie, as always, gives good advice. I do the numbness thing too, but it's a bitch sometimes. Keep your friends close right now. Like most chicks, you'll probably want to talk about it for a while. Rotate those friends out, though, cause it's hard on them to hear it after a while. Write (NOT to him), draw, or dance... whatever you're preferred method of self expression may be. Get it OUT! (Crying ain't nothing but emotional vomiting, & a broken heart can be one HELL of a belly ache!)

Also, be thankful that you were allowed to feel such love as to now be so broken from it's loss. Love is always a gift to be cherished, even when it has died. It's all cyclical. Love will have it's way with you again soon enough.

Come to Sanctus & dance those blues away!

...sending support...

& I muchly agree with many ov the suggestionz from Junkie, Mother Mo, & otherz.

What can I add? How 'bout.... now iz u time. Sure there haz been a loss, a change, n ur life; but that simply openz up new possibiliez 2 u. One chapter cumz 2 an end, just 4 the next 2 b written. Otherz may cum n2 ur life & go ... life iz tranzition ... U r n the driver'z seat ov ur life. Az the healing process movez 4ward, consider ur own ambitionz & dezirez more deeply; & abov all, b tru 2 urself.

sadly, i think time is the only thing that actually HEALS a broken heart. transition guys help speed along the process, they atleast distract you from pain.

my favorite thing to do after a break up or broken heart, GO PANTY SHOPPING. and i'm not talking about some white cotton shit with cherries on them, granted those are cute. you march your ass into fredricks or victoria secret, and you buy some of the hottest, dirtiest, most naughty lingerie you can find. black lace is always a plus, every woman should have black lace lingerie. and don't think about him not seeing it or wanting to, no no don't use that mentality. next time you see him think of the hot ass panties you have on and the fact that he will never see them, because he doesn't deserve to. he will never see them again, and its his loss. you are saving your hot ass panties for someone else, someone who is worthy. get in line boys, hmmmm, which one do i want to show my panties to? plus i feel hot as hell if i'm wearing hot lingerie, even if i'm only wearing sweats.

you can also use that as a metaphor in a way.. everyone puts up a bit of a front in relationships, its a defense mechanism. you wait to show them every side of yourself. even the diamond inside( your true self), thats surrounded by all the rough crap, flaws, or baggage that we all have. eventually someone will come along who doesn't care about all that and can see right through it all to the diamond inside. its that person who is worthy of seeing every side of you and actually getting close to. its that guy who is worthy of seeing your hot ass panties, not the fucktard that broke your heart.

if that helps at all, use it to your heart's comtempt. sadly though, i have shown my panties to a few toads, and still have yet to find my prince. someday.

the panty idea so graciously given by gwen will help get your mind off the "subject" but i believe the best is the idea given by stormstress, mother mo, and junkie...
Although the pain hurts now.. it will not last forever. Do not sink yourself to that lowly level only because you feel depressed. That will be even harder to overcome. By moving on and living your life as normal or as normal to be expected will actually ease the pain and maybe sting those who have hurt you. But remember do what is best for YOU not just because it works for someone else. YOU are what is important now and you need to find that certain something that makes you happy, not just another being.
Any time you want a listening ear or shoulder to cry on, be not afraid to ask.. even strangers.. sometimes it is best to talk to those who have no idea already fixtated on a certain subject but who is rather biased.

The thing that helps the most.....remembering who you are living your life for. You. No one else. In the end it only matters how happy you were during life. Rule Number One of Scarecrow's life philosophy. You First. You must make yourself happy. I can't say that I have been the best at it but it is definately a goal to aspire to. Life is to short to waste tears on the ones who do not make us aspire to greater things. Those who drag us down. In the end, you are the one who matters. One day you will look back and say, "He was so not worht the time and effort nor the sadness I felt at his parting." Why wait for one day. Start now. Hope everything gets better for you.

start collecting dingleberries.
i dont know a single depressed person with a dingleberry collection.

gwenhwyfar wrote:sadly, i think time is the only thing that actually HEALS a broken heart. transition guys help speed along the process, they atleast distract you from pain.
.

I've lovingly referred to them as "distraction bois" before...

I'd have to say time is the only thing I've ever found to work.

And I know it doesn't help but,

A)he was a republican
B)he was an assclown
C)you deserve so much better
D)your boobs deserve a real man groping them, not a douche bag.

lots of love..

Aye, writing is the best means.. Just allow the pain inside to flow through the pen and allow the words to spill upon the paper.

After that, try not to think about the pain.

Best advice I can give.

Know how you feel.

Good luck

~Hadessious Darkreaver~
~The Angellic Demon.~

Thank you all. I do plan on coming out to Sanctus this Sunday. Need it this month more than ever so I hope to see the lot of you out and those I haven't met before, well, hopefully I will get to meet you this time. I'll be in a frilly red dress (a few who went to my work Holiday party and one special person who helped with alterations have seen it before) that makes me feel gorgeous. I don't expect to be better by then but a night out with fun people surely can't hurt. Keep the advice coming, I appreciate it all.

Like Darkweaver said, write it all down, get it off your chest then rip it up and burn it! Friends will be there for you & take time to spoil yourself. And sometimes all you need is a ((((hug))))

make sure you stop by and get many many huggles from me and i bet you can even talk jim into one or two hehehee,for we have many to give out for those who need and wish them dear. there is no fast and easy way of mending the heart ,but i do know that having friends around does help out so much !
huggles ,
littleseeker