I found this while cleaning out my old email account, and thought it was funny enough to dust off and share.


Top 10 Reasons Why Star Wars Characters Would Kick Butt In The Star Trek Universe:

10) In the Star Wars universe, weapons rarely, if ever, are set on
"stun."

9) The Enterprise needs a huge engine room with an anti-matter unit and a crew of twenty just to go into warp. The Millenium Falcon does the same thing with just R2-D2 and a Wookie.

After resisting the Imperial torture droid and Darth Vader, Princess Leia still looked fresh and desirable. After enduring Cardassian starvation torture, Picard looked like hell.

7) One word: lightsabers.

6) Darth Vader could choke the entire Borg empire with one glance.

5) The Death Star doesn't care if a world is class "M" or not.

4) Luke Skywalker is not obsessed with sleeping with every alien he encounters.

3) Jabba the Hutt would eat Harry Mudd for trying to cut in on his
action.

2) The Federation would have to interrupt whatever it's doing just to attempt to liberate any ship named Slave I.

And the number one reason ...

1) Picard pilots Enterprise through asteroid belts at one-quarter
impulse power. Han Solo floors it.

but "Q" would blink the death star out of exisence.
and Khan is one of the coolest villans ever!
(next to megatron and darth vader)

And luke isn't obesessed with sleeping w/ aliens-he's obsessed with his sister!

also anti star wars....
two words: Jar Jar

Balance wrote:also anti star wars....
two words: Jar Jar

I am fairly certain this list was lost in my email long before Jar Jar was ever heard of

Cmon now Tommy....can't you just do the same thing the REAL star wars geeks have done...and simply ignore the fact there is an Episode I, and make up your own in your immagination?

We used to play this game at work.

Star wars vs. Star Trek vs. Babylon 5 Deathmatch


In a battle to the death among the following...who would win?

Han Solo vs. Captain Kirk vs. Captain Sheridan

Princess Leah vs. Captain Janeway vs. Comander Ivanova

X-wing vs. DS9 Runabout vs Starfury

Millenium Falcon vs. DS9 Defiant vs, White Star

Death Star vs. Borg Cube vs. Vorlon Planet Killer


In my opinion, the first one is a toss up. Princess Leah is screwed unless she works on her force abilities. The Star Fury's best chance is if the X-wing and Runabout kill each other, not that the x-wing has a chance either. The Falcon is really screwed because it is held together with duct tape. I think the White Star would win because it is self repairing. The Borg Cube is also screwed. True they could adapt to the fire from the other vessles eventually. But the Death Star is reputed to destroy ships with one shot. I think that it would have more than enough tiime to charge weapons again before the Vorlons.



Yes....I am a closet geek. I blame the monkeys.

Yes....I am a closet geek. I blame the monkeys.

'

I resemble that remark!!
Careful or we divulge all your "grey" secrets!!!

ms.tangledwebs wrote:

Balance wrote:also anti star wars....
two words: Jar Jar

I am fairly certain this list was lost in my email long before Jar Jar was ever heard of

As a huge Star Wars fan and not much of a trekkie I whole heartedly agree that Star Wars would kikk their ass.....and as for Jar Jar....well even as annoying as he is...he did give Palpatine total supremecy...so even the annoying little bastard has his place in the grand scheme of things

Star Wars FAN here.....

It's all about the plot. Screw the bad acting and terrible characters.
Go back and read some reviews of A New Hope some time.
I saw A New Hope at a drive-in. Oops, that dates me a little, doesn't it?

celticsmith wrote:We used to play this game at work.

Star wars vs. Star Trek vs. Babylon 5 Deathmatch

ok here we go-- no i havnt looked at the "answers" cuz this ought to be fun..

celticsmith wrote:In a battle to the death among the following...who would win?

hit it.

celticsmith wrote:Han Solo vs. Captain Kirk vs. Captain Sheridan

solo. hands down. no mind games, no prime directive, no rules. he shoots under the table.

celticsmith wrote:Princess Leah vs. Captain Janeway vs. Comander Ivanova

tough call-- from the books, leah- shes a low order jedi, - but a jedi nonetheless- who would stomp the other 2. from tv, ivanova- she has an evil, and maliciouus sreak and is rathar opinionated as to where the brass can "stick it" janeway has to follow the rules.. pity- shes a redhead..

celticsmith wrote:X-wing vs. DS9 Runabout vs Starfury

runabout is toast.
no manuverability, lack of decent weapons no control surfaces druing atmospheric flight...
<tho if you find somone to look up the specs, somone may argue differently>
x wing, small and manouverablewith good atmospheric flight surfaces, but if somone actually hit it itd be toast.

starfurry has reversing thrusters on all 4 points making for rotational ability during "flight" thru space..
in summary- in space, star furry hands down.
in atmosphere, 70% starfurry, 30% xwing 0% runnabout.

celticsmith wrote:Millenium Falcon vs. DS9 Defiant vs, White Star

falcon .5 past light, as i recall the defuiant is faster.. but this is not a race.
more guns on the falcon.
tho the white star has cut a serious capability to traget and hit anything its captian chooses.
defiant = toast.
MF = beat up.
WS = king o the hill.

and just for fun- the excalibur, assuming it could hit any target and kill it in one shot would win.. kinda like the death star. tho itd be worthless for a minute after firing, and could be taken out by a few well placed irriadated spitaballs.

celticsmith wrote:Death Star vs. Borg Cube vs. Vorlon Planet Killer

death star would take out a cube no problem, if it can reduce a planet to rubble.
cube cant lean anythign if it is rubble. besides- if the DS missed <repeatedly> what are they going to do-- drag it away for analysis..? its the size of a moon, for shrissake!!
planet killer...
interesting idea..
mostly a closing geodesig latice whithin a cloud, encirclating a planet, then dropping in boring nuke heads into its core.

the DS is toast. period. its the size of a small moon. its a planet killer. sorry.
tho i would think the cube would be manouverable enough to stay out of the center of the planet killer...
and the cube would be stomped by a blase from the death star..
summary:
we basically have a "rock, scissors, paper" contest on this one..

Ok UBEr g33k mode on (oh yeah like thats a challenge)

Star wars vs Star trek geek factor Roddenberry a swinger who made out with most of the actresses on his show and was buried in space with timothy leary

Lucas once a edgy young movie maker who now spoils every thing he ever made, (probably new made out with anyone) and now makes movies for his adopted kids.


Star wars helped give birth to modern space opera but is now fading.

Star trek helped give birth to actual modern space flight (which is now fading)

Star Wars interesting characters who eventually devolve into dorks for the plots sake.

Star Trek dorks who eventually evolve into interesting dorks for plots sake.

Star wars cooler production design

Star trek way more production design


Star wars started with many premovie novels (the Han solo series is probably on of the best in this style) but has had ABSOLUTLY the worst crap for post return of the jedi which has really messed up the prequals.

Star trek hundreds if not thousands of good extra movie novels but they have no effect (or influence, or anything to do) on or with the series or movies.



Okay onto the battles SW+DS9+B5

HS+CK+CS
Han Solo is a great shot but the man can be ambushed by a three year old, Sheridan and Kirk are masters of ambushes, so they both take turns taking out HS. Eventually Sinclair shows up and beats the shit out of Sheridan then both him and kirk go out and get some alien strange.

PL+CJ+CI
Leaha has abilities but she never developed them and lacks any real combat skills, Janeway has toooo big of a stick up her ass, so Ivanova wins by forcing them all into a three way (Yay!).

X+RUN+StarFury
No real reason to go into this Starfury wins.

MF+Defiant+WS
Mellenium Falcon vs Defiant not even a contest, the Defiant. The Defiant is bigger, better built, .5 light is what the Defient refers to as impulse drive, way out guns (with guns that count) the Mellenium Falcon. The Defiant was designed to kill ships the size of a Star destroyer, the Falcon runs and hides from SDs. In a battle the Defiant would warp in beam the engine and crew of the Falcon into space launch about a dozen torpedos to chase the floating hulk down and warp out before Han could finish kicking the egines enough times for the mid morning half ass repair job. Defiant vs White Star (which might actually have a tougher battle with the falcon due to them being simmilar sci fi type ships, but it would win since the WSs repair them selfs). Well in the B5 universe they dont have transporter tech so the pretty much hands the victory to the defient, (but that debends on the defient crew rembering they have transporter tech) and I think the with the warp and its weapons it is also a much better fighter, So Im giving it to the devient but just by a inch or two.

DS+BC+VPK
Star kills cube, Killer kills Star, the end. (why is this a question)

Oh I love both of those....

I suppose the cube is also screwed by the fact that Vorlons are not assimalateable (if that is even a word).

See...Isn't this a fun game!

No how about:

Boba Fett vs. Worf vs. G'kar?

I think G'kar would win since he would let Worf and Boba duke it out and then take out the winner.

or...

Star Destroyer vs. Soverien class Enterprise E vs. Minbari Cruiser?

SD---all those turbolasers and heavy sheilds.....manuvers like a truck though and is totally vulnerable from the back.

Enterprise E --- Fast, very manuverable, Less guns but more bang for the buck.

Minbari Cruiser --- Moderately manuverable, Less guns than Enterprise...but it also has a wing or two of fighters.

and the winner is?

None of them....because as the are duking it out in swoops the BATTLESTAR GALACTICA and takes them all out.


Actually there is a a screen saver that would settle most of these ship arguments. The space battle screen saver!

http://www.savagescreen.com/

It is just so cool!

But sitting on the side lines are Q, Dr. Who and the Elder Race.


But who is watching them all, you ask?

Why Chthulu you sillies.

Pharinet wrote:But sitting on the side lines are Q, Dr. Who and the Elder Race.


But who is watching them all, you ask?

Why Chthulu you sillies.

well yeah got to have an audience

BF+W+G
well BF beats worf because worf would only fight with one of those stupid klingon weapon and BF would stand back and just shoot him in the head. BF against Gkar??? Ive never really seen Gkar fight one on one so cant make a choice.

SD+EntE+MC
if they just do a slug fest the SD, but if the E and the MC use stratagy either of them have enough firepower to hit the SD weak spot its bridge, you hit that and its out of the battle. E vs MC well again just because of speed and transporter tech (again with the qualification the the crew has to remember they actually have it) I would have to give it to the E. (ofcourse with any star trek ship there is that random "captain! the wind changed direction warp core breach in 3 seconds!!!!" so you never know)

Old battlestar Galactica easy win with all its nukes. The new one, well..... it would be too busy going to make babies .

(okay I've permitly marked what little rep I had)

[geeksession]hmm... I'm gonna say something silly and totally pointless which I read in a magazine arguing this same thing. I'm not much of a sci-fi fan, but I did understand the point it was trying to make... The Star destroyers and other starwars vehicles are equipped with old school lasers (which the old star trek initially had before they presumably upgraded to phasers and photon torpedos...). Since lasers were outdated and the shields on the startrek ships now deflect them (which was brought up in an episode of ST:TNG where a small outdated cruiser tries to force a the enterprise into handing over a prisoner), wouldn't that pose a bit of a problem for the Star wars fighters and ships? (The magazine posed that as food for thought... I thought it was interesting, but I could care less about the outcome... lol) [/geeksession]

Star Wars beats Star Trek for one reason:
Princess Leia as a slave girl.

Nuff said.