Maryville man caught nude, covered in nacho cheese.

Zeo · Post by **Zeo** » Thu Jul 22, 2004 6:04 pm

Associated press version here:
http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=s ... ude_nachos

Nude man caught covered in nacho cheese
2004-07-19
by Lance Coleman
of The Daily Times Staff

A Maryville man spent his 23rd birthday in custody after police said they found him early Sunday running nude from the John Sevier pool snack bar with a box of stolen snacks.

Authorities said the man had apparently scaled an 8-foot tall fence while naked and covered in nacho cheese and was seen running toward a Jeep in which officers found clothing and an open bottle of vodka.

According to Maryville police, Michael P. Monn, born July 18, 1981, of McCall Road, Maryville, was arrested by officer Scott Spicer at 5 a.m. Sunday in the parking lot of the pool at John Sevier School, Sequoyah Avenue. Monn was charged with burglary, theft of property less than $500, vandalism less than $500 and public intoxication. He was also cited with indecent exposure. Monn was held at the Blount County Jail in lieu of $9,300 bond pending a 9 a.m. Aug. 3 General Sessions Court hearing.

Spicer reported at 3:38 a.m. Sunday he saw a Jeep CJ-7 in the parking lot of the pool and saw an open bottle of vodka in the console along with various articles of clothing. Minutes later, a nude man carrying a cardboard box ran toward the Jeep before Spicer stopped him and found the box filled with Frito Lay snacks and a container of nacho cheese.

``In addition, the male had nacho cheese in his hair, on his face and on his shoulders,'' Spicer reported. ``The nude male had a strong odor of alcohol and was semi-incoherent.''

An official with Maryville Alcoa Blount County Parks and Recreation was called to the scene and together with police, they searched the facility. They found someone had climbed an 8 foot fence, broke into the snack bar through a window, ransacked the facility, left the freezer door open and caused $100 damage by ripping the water heater from the wall, according to a report.

Authorities reported someone also defecated in a garbage can, threw nacho cheese on the exterior wall of the snack bar and scattered chips on the ground outside the facility. About $40 in chips and $7 in nacho cheese were stolen from the snack bar, police said.

FreakySeekers · Post by **FreakySeekers** » Thu Jul 22, 2004 6:18 pm

It ain't easy, bein cheesy. :rofl:

Mother Mo · Post by **Mother Mo** » Thu Jul 22, 2004 6:39 pm

I bet his momma's REAL proud! :roll:

iblis · Post by **iblis** » Thu Jul 22, 2004 7:42 pm

Never underestimate the power of the munchies.

karmakaze · Post by **karmakaze** » Thu Jul 22, 2004 8:24 pm

just think. i grew up in this area. thats only a few min from my house.

(granted, everything in maryville is only a few min away from everything else in maryville)

LostSoul · Post by **LostSoul** » Thu Jul 22, 2004 9:05 pm

mmmmmmm cheeese, i love the extra sharp cheddar cheese and i have just recently been introduced to pimento cheese spread, which i am now happily addicted to :rock:

who else likes to divulge into thier cabinets for a fresh block of cheese??

QueenOfTheFlock · Post by **QueenOfTheFlock** » Thu Jul 22, 2004 9:20 pm

karmakaze wrote:just think. i grew up in this area. thats only a few min from my house. (granted, everything in maryville is only a few min away from everything else in maryville)

That's what I'm screaming...I'm surprised that none of us Maryville people know who it is (or do we?). I just wish I had seen it.

satanskitten · Post by **satanskitten** » Thu Jul 22, 2004 10:36 pm

Behold the power of cheese

The Lizard Princess · Thu Jul 22, 2004 10:43 pm

wow thats pretty F***ing funny....my mom told me earlier today....I laughed my ass off! well....lucky he wasnt any of my friends from there lol

Mistress Eve(L) · Post by **Mistress Eve(L)** » Thu Jul 22, 2004 10:50 pm

vodka $7
property damage less than $200
bond $9300

The regret of knowing you will forever be known as that naked nacho cheese guy, and never getting laid becasue of it........

priceless.

Aubri Wolf · Post by **Aubri Wolf** » Thu Jul 22, 2004 11:23 pm

Mistress Eve(L) wrote:vodka $7
property damage less than $200
bond $9300

The regret of knowing you will forever be known as that naked nacho cheese guy, and never getting laid becasue of it........

priceless.

Gawd that is so funny :roofle:

Aubri *Laughing* Wolf, Out

Mercurygriffin · Post by **Mercurygriffin** » Fri Jul 23, 2004 12:10 am

Munch on this. He is only 6 days younger than me. :twisted:

Mistress Eve(L) · Post by **Mistress Eve(L)** » Fri Jul 23, 2004 12:19 am

k , I would say no nacho cheese for the Griffen....but really I was your age once,....and it never occured to me to put nacho cheese on myself and run around naked....not even with pharmeceutical enhancement.....did that ever occur to me as something to do at the moment.

Mercurygriffin · Post by **Mercurygriffin** » Fri Jul 23, 2004 12:23 am

I prefer chocolate icing anyway.

LostSoul · Post by **LostSoul** » Fri Jul 23, 2004 12:26 pm

chocolate icing?!?! where!?
mmmmmm chocolate and strawberries

QueenOfTheFlock · Post by **QueenOfTheFlock** » Fri Jul 23, 2004 12:40 pm

Now you're talking my language...point me in the direction of the nearest park!

white_darkness · Post by **white_darkness** » Fri Jul 23, 2004 12:46 pm

You people know how to party out there.

sic_fuck · Post by **sic_fuck** » Mon Jul 26, 2004 6:51 am

I've asked two other people about this guy and NOONE knows who it is. I think it's a vast government conspiracy to supress the consumption of nacho cheese and or Fridos. Or he may be related to the guy who came to Sanctus in a bunny suit.

TiredUnhappy · Post by **TiredUnhappy** » Mon Jul 26, 2004 8:28 am

sic_fuck wrote:I've asked two other people about this guy and NOONE knows who it is. I think it's a vast government conspiracy to supress the consumption of nacho cheese and or Fridos. Or he may be related to the guy who came to Sanctus in a bunny suit.

I happen to have said bunny suit in my room right now. :twisted:

Scorptrio · Post by **Scorptrio** » Mon Jul 26, 2004 2:28 pm

You skinned the poor creature and you're proud of it?! TiredUnhappyVicious!

. :smash:

hehehe

Maryville man caught nude, covered in nacho cheese.

Maryville man caught nude, covered in nacho cheese.

augh!