New but not you know

test0verride · Post by **test0verride** » Tue Nov 16, 2004 4:48 pm

Well, i guess it is time for me to post something. I have been interested in the whole gothic sceen for most of my life, but never followed up on it. I am just coming out of a very long and very damaging relationship. I no longer have any friends and have not had any for a very long time. I am a student/father/full time employee. I reliaze now that i no longer know who i am, what i like or what i want to do. I ran a BBS for the longest time, but due to the relationship i had to take it down. Bah, if you want to know more just let me know, i am not short on self-pity right now (joke)

ok so a little background on me is finished. It is time to get back to myself and heal a devastated heart. I do not know how much i will post here, but i will be watching.

LordHades · Post by **LordHades** » Tue Nov 16, 2004 4:57 pm

Well, it's good to meet you, though I can certainly see you have your plate full. You'll find alot of warm, generous, and caring people here though, who can no doubt help with a friendly ear, and some sage advice, alot of them have gone through similar situations and will know where you're coming from, and what might help. Sympathy and understanding abounds here, if you look past all the transitory drama that crops up now and then

Still, I'm not known for my empathy, so I'll leave that to the experts and do what I do best, remain socially oblivious and ask inappropriate questions of people I don't know well. What are your interests and hobbies? What part of the gothic scene draws you? The look, the music, the concept, the general cynical outlook?
What type of BBS was it? It sounds like that was a pretty big thing for you, so no doubt it'll give some insight into who you are for folks. You may even find some old friends here from it

It seems a very eclectic group.

Well, again, welcome, and do enjoy yourself as much as you feel you can

test0verride · Post by **test0verride** » Tue Nov 16, 2004 5:18 pm

well, that was fast

you have brought up the question i have been thinking of for about a month now, what are my interests/hobbeis? after more than 9 years not being myself, the only thing i know for sure is:

1) I am an open book and an open mind, nothinig is out of bounds or taboo.
2) I love computers and technology (getting my bachelors degree in network security and forensics)
3) there is nothing more beautiful than a gothic women (the look, the outlook, etc..)
4) i love reading and books
5) i like almost all forms of music
6) i am a hopelss romantic (be it good or bad)
7) I am NOT christian (like for sure on that one)

basically what attracts me to the gothic sceen is the look and the way of thinking. As for myself i do not look the part, blonde hair blue eyes, short hair, normal clothes, But it has been a long time since i have know myself. I gained too much weight while married, the depression lead to eatting and the eatting led to FAT, which is now coming of slowly

a little too slowly for my liking.

I will point this out for the record. #1 is probably what i value most about myself. I am open and open minded, nothing offends so yuou guys can feel free to ask anything you want and i will try my best to honestly answer the question.

vicious_blood · Post by **vicious_blood** » Tue Nov 16, 2004 5:25 pm

Hi...are you a dude or dudette?

Maybe I just didn't read that...

Asher · Post by **Asher** » Tue Nov 16, 2004 5:27 pm

Hi there!

-hugs-

I'm new to the knoxville scene as well, though not new to the scene as a whole. Welcome..and i think i can probably speak for most of us when i say we are here for you should you need anything.

-ASHER-

vicious_blood · Post by **vicious_blood** » Tue Nov 16, 2004 5:27 pm

Oh nevermind. I'm :loco:

test0verride · Post by **test0verride** » Tue Nov 16, 2004 5:46 pm

ok class is about to start is this one is short.

I am not looking for sex or a relationship. I am looking for some adult conversation. Pretty much the past 5 years has been spent talking to and with my children, so i am a little outta touch with the adult conversation world

I will probably show up at the coffee house and stuff from time to time as school and work permit.

anyway just thought i would throw that in there. Not that there is anything wrong with sex and relationship i love them both very much, and probably could not turn down the beautiful people have have seen at sanctus. YES i have been to 1 or 2 of them over the past 3 years

I am the one that always looks out of place. I need a deeper connection of the soul right now. A connection with like minded adults and good conversation.

dammit time for class gotta run!

The Stormstress · Post by **The Stormstress** » Tue Nov 16, 2004 6:27 pm

Grrreetingz & Velcum! :twisted:

Conversation iz pretty eazy 2 cum by here, although I won't vouch 4 it'z fully adult n8ur. We hav memberz from teenz on up 2 40-sumthingz (that I kno ov) ... Many ov us r rather playful sortz; hope u njoy!

ms.tangledwebs · Post by **ms.tangledwebs** » Tue Nov 16, 2004 6:50 pm

Welcome!! glad to have you here.... Just cause I love the kiddies... how old are/is yours? We are always happy about new goff babies.

test0verride · Post by **test0verride** » Tue Nov 16, 2004 7:45 pm

i have 2, my son is 4 (5 on dec. 22) and my daughter is 3 (may 17).

ok, break is over back to class

test0verride · Post by **test0verride** » Wed Nov 17, 2004 4:01 pm

oh yeah, i have not really done anything since i moved back here from Southern California (Long Beach Area). I missed california and wanted to go back. I withdrew from everyone and everything, so now many years later I am a blank canvas ready to be painted. I do not think my soon to be X wife was the problem, we were/are a good match, i think it was the baggage we brought into the relationship that messed everything up.

I need to get out more

Nigredo · Post by **Nigredo** » Wed Nov 17, 2004 6:57 pm

I bid you Velcome. :blackbat:

uncle goth · Post by **uncle goth** » Wed Nov 17, 2004 7:27 pm

im new here too, you'll find if you relax and be yourself you'll be accepted. nobody will bite you,(unless they ask first) so dont be afraid tojust talk to people who look interesting

shadow dancer · Post by **shadow dancer** » Wed Nov 17, 2004 10:01 pm

Welcome to the forum.

SilentScreams · Post by **SilentScreams** » Thu Nov 18, 2004 3:02 am

Welcome. Sit back and relax. It seems like you just need a place to vent and someone to listen.. definitely found it. I can totally sympathize with you on the adult conversation. I was in a very bad relationship for 8 yrs myself and forced to be a stay at home mom. I didnt get adult conversation until may of this year. Feel free to pm or the like if you ever need to chat. We wouldn't be posting on this board if we didn't want to see what you had to say

test0verride · Post by **test0verride** » Thu Nov 18, 2004 3:23 pm

thank all of you for thekind words.

I was pretty much forced into being a stay at home father (outside of work). I do not have nay hard feelings about the relationship and i would go back in time and cahnge that we got together as that would eliminate my children which are pretty much my world. Everything i have done lately has been for them, going back to school etc..

but yes i would like to talk, not really vent though i could probably use it

it is just a matter of getting back to myself and what i like

Lost Traveler · Post by **Lost Traveler** » Thu Nov 18, 2004 3:57 pm